Not Only My Story

Week of September 22, 2014

This is the first week of recovery had its highs and its lows.  The highs came in having my best friend here to help me in my recovery to gain my strength, cook for me and my family, and just spend time with me and catching up. Lows came in bouts of pain, gas pain, and believing I could do more than I actually could.  

I have never been one to ask for help, or see my limitations.  When I was a kid, I had to help take care of my 4 little sisters and taking care of myself was never a priority.  Sometimes I would look at my responsibilities as a big sister as a burden, and other times, I saw that I could be all that stood between my step father's rage and evil in getting to them.  When my mom finally divorced him, my role as a secondary care giver increased.  One time when I was in the grocery store buying groceries with my littlest sister (14 years my junior) she accidentally called me mom and people heard and stared.  It's funny now, but then I was a mortified teenager.  So, relying on myself became necessary, and leaning on others wasn't something I was ever comfortable with.  

If I didn't have my best friend here, I truly believe that my recovery would have been even slower than it was.  She would do some restorative yoga on me to increase circulation and promote healing, and I could tell in small ways that it was helping me. I started to get outside and walk down the street and back, and I did it twice in the day.  The next day, was a true low for me.  I finally had a bowel movement after 7 days, it was painful, took everything out of me, and I felt like I had taken a big leap back in my recovery.  I spent all day sitting, and using the bathroom several times during the day.  This was definitely a low for me!  

On September 25 I took my measurements to see my progress beyond the scale:
Neck: 14"
Left upper arm: 17 1/2"
Upper chest: 56"
Lower chest: 46"
Waist: 48 1/4"
Hips: 70 1/2"
Left thigh: 39"
Calf: 19 1/2"